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My life in type....
Saturday, April 03, 2004
My father was sick. Very sick.
I was the one who was available to bring him back and forth to the hospital for radiation and chemo treatments.
Every day. For months.
I felt like I was driving him to his death.
Even though I know it wasn't me that killed him, I feel like it was me who tore him down bit by bit, cell by cell. Mile by mile. Carted him back and forth waiting for the inevitable end.
It was the cancer... lung then liver then bone then brain.
All the miles added up to nothing. The chemo only tore apart, it did not rebuild. It's not supposed to. I wish it did.
This May 16th marks the 10th aniversary of his death. I'm going back to make peace with him on that day. 2,856 miles.
Those miles will heal this time.
I was the one who was available to bring him back and forth to the hospital for radiation and chemo treatments.
Every day. For months.
I felt like I was driving him to his death.
Even though I know it wasn't me that killed him, I feel like it was me who tore him down bit by bit, cell by cell. Mile by mile. Carted him back and forth waiting for the inevitable end.
It was the cancer... lung then liver then bone then brain.
All the miles added up to nothing. The chemo only tore apart, it did not rebuild. It's not supposed to. I wish it did.
This May 16th marks the 10th aniversary of his death. I'm going back to make peace with him on that day. 2,856 miles.
Those miles will heal this time.
Friday, April 02, 2004
Well....
Just a bit drunk right now, so I have a real excuse for typos. Just as long as that's clear...
R's been at work for about a month now. I actually like having him around. It's working. So far. He seems to be working his way into our office culture very well. It's nice to hear laughter coming from the other side of the office.
Drunk. More buzzed than drunk. I'm at that point where I could go either way... drink way more than I should or just fall asleep. I'm thinking it will be the latter. No problem.
Gotta love a well made Bloody Mary. The local watering hole makes the best.
Solo day for me tomorrow. I'm excited. I get to go for a fitting for my dress for my mom's wedding, I think I'm going to make a quick (hopefully) through Nordstrom's lingerie department and stop and pick up a few more books to read. I have to have more than one going at a time or I feel a bit lost. Go figure.
I really wish I could record how many typos I've made and how many times I've had to backspace to fix things. How funny. I can type, I swear.
Ooooooo.... yeah..... That mean lady at work got fired today. Very very interesting. Some people are very very happy. Others are PISSED!! Our year-end (fiscal) meeting is Monday at 8:00. This should be good. Very Very interesting. I'm sure this will be a hot topic for a while. I really need to stay out of it. Fine by me.
My tummy is very very full. I really wish I didn't have such a phobia about vomiting. I could use a pressure change right about now. Not to mention those damn hot wings. I'm going to pay for that tomorrow. Nothing like ulcers in your intestines. Time for the little white pill. My only salvation as of late. I need to get back in to see my doctor again. There is some serious tom-foolery going on inside my gut. Must drink water.
Guh.
Nite....
Just a bit drunk right now, so I have a real excuse for typos. Just as long as that's clear...
R's been at work for about a month now. I actually like having him around. It's working. So far. He seems to be working his way into our office culture very well. It's nice to hear laughter coming from the other side of the office.
Drunk. More buzzed than drunk. I'm at that point where I could go either way... drink way more than I should or just fall asleep. I'm thinking it will be the latter. No problem.
Gotta love a well made Bloody Mary. The local watering hole makes the best.
Solo day for me tomorrow. I'm excited. I get to go for a fitting for my dress for my mom's wedding, I think I'm going to make a quick (hopefully) through Nordstrom's lingerie department and stop and pick up a few more books to read. I have to have more than one going at a time or I feel a bit lost. Go figure.
I really wish I could record how many typos I've made and how many times I've had to backspace to fix things. How funny. I can type, I swear.
Ooooooo.... yeah..... That mean lady at work got fired today. Very very interesting. Some people are very very happy. Others are PISSED!! Our year-end (fiscal) meeting is Monday at 8:00. This should be good. Very Very interesting. I'm sure this will be a hot topic for a while. I really need to stay out of it. Fine by me.
My tummy is very very full. I really wish I didn't have such a phobia about vomiting. I could use a pressure change right about now. Not to mention those damn hot wings. I'm going to pay for that tomorrow. Nothing like ulcers in your intestines. Time for the little white pill. My only salvation as of late. I need to get back in to see my doctor again. There is some serious tom-foolery going on inside my gut. Must drink water.
Guh.
Nite....
